


Do You Wanna Be a Bit Beautiful

by SongAboutExiles



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: First Time, Fluff and Smut, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-09
Updated: 2014-07-09
Packaged: 2018-02-08 01:54:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1922319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SongAboutExiles/pseuds/SongAboutExiles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You're a ridiculous, fussy, little-old-man child who wears cardigans and tuts at things. AND you've just had a major brain injury." Phil wasn't immune to the boy's charms, but he thought he'd hidden the fact well enough to escape notice. Whether he was charmed or not, Fitz was young enough to be his son. Which meant, congruently, that he was old enough to be the boy's father.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Do You Wanna Be a Bit Beautiful

"You're a CHILD." Phil had been trying to explain that to this many-handed, determined little creature for at least the past quarter hour, since the frontal assault had begun. 

"No. No, I'm not, and I want you." Fitz tried again to reach out and touch his commanding officer, hands sneaking in through Coulson's guard better than May on a bender against HYDRA agents. It was uncanny, is what it was.

"You're a ridiculous, fussy, little-old-man child who wears cardigans and tuts at things. AND you've just had a major brain injury." Phil wasn't immune to the boy's charms, but he thought he'd hidden the fact well enough to escape notice. Whether he was charmed or not, Fitz was young enough to be his son. Which meant, congruently, that he was old enough to be the boy's father.

"Which gave me a whole new perspective! When I opened my eyes on the bus, who was there? Who was always there? I don't think I'm giving out any spoiler alerts when I say it was you. You were always there. How could you even BE always there? You're running all of bloody SHIELD now." Finally, Fitz stopped assaulting Phil and stood exasperated with his hands on his hips. 

"I find time for what's important." _Crap, that probably sounded...inappropriate._

"AHA! You see? I'm important to you because you want me." It was all so clear! Why on earth did Coulson not see it?

"You're in love with Jemma, remember?" Of course, Phil knew better than most anyone that you could love so many people so much that your heart was constantly threatening to burst. He was intimately familiar with the concept.

"That...that doesn't matter. She's with Antoine, and that's...fine. I'm not her type. I'm her best friend, and that's good enough." She'd come in after he'd regained alertness and explained it all to him oh so patiently. So careful to try and preserve their friendship after he'd gone and blurted out everything he felt like the giant geek he'd always been. "Am I your type?"

Phil had thought for certain that Fitz was out cold all the times he'd held the boy's hand, brushed the messy curls off his forehead, murmured to him about everything and nothing to keep his brain engaged on some deep, atavistic level. And yet here was Fitz, acting like he remembered every syllable of nonsense. 

"If you were fifteen years older, Leo, you would absolutely be my type." 

"You called me Leo." It made him smile, sweeter than Phil could ever remember seeing. "Are you going to make me wait fifteen years? Because I will wait fifteen years." 

"I think you're missing the point." Because in fifteen years, Coulson would be even older, even less worthy of such a vibrant, brilliant boy.

"With all due respect, Director Coulson, your point is complete and total bollocks to begin with." Fitz managed to curl his hands around the older man's arms, sidling a little closer. "I haven't been a child...ever. And I'm not one now." 

"Do you even...have you even...Fitz, do you even know what you're asking?" Not his finest rejoinder, but Coulson's resolve was eroding alarmingly. Why did this boy have to be so damned beautiful and ridiculous and impossible?

"Are you seriously asking me if I'm a virgin?" If they'd progressed to that point, in Fitz's mind they'd obviously gone from 'no way in hell' to 'let's negotiate terms.' 

"I...only in so far as it's...relevant." Because it was relevant. Because Fitz had slid his capable, deft hands up Phil's arms to rest on his shoulders. Because he was tense with the conflict of honor and long-untended need.

"Only that far? Well, okay then. Yes." Fitz found the tension delicious, in a perverse sort of way. He was so, so sorry that he was upsetting Phil, but this was necessary. Like breathing, like fighting for their lives, like taking moments to remind themselves WHY. "But that doesn't mean I'm ignorant. I know that I want you."

"You are actually trying to kill me right now, aren't you?" It wasn't that Phil had a deflowering kink, but Jesus. How often did adorable, infuriating virgins show up at his age to beg him to be their first? Another spoiler alert-that-wasn't: they don't. In fact, they never had. Phil had spent most of his life so deep in his work that he could count his lovers on one hand.

"Nah, I'm just crazy about you." That simple declaration, the blush that only now had the good grace to appear on Fitz's cheeks, the sweet sincerity. Phil wasn't made of stone. He still wasn't sure what all he WAS made of, not anymore, but maybe it was time to let himself live again.

With a child. Christ. "How old are you, Leopold Fitz?' He knew the answer. Of course he did.

"I'm twenty four years old, Philip. And I think I've waited long enough for someone to love me." Fitz's hands cupped the older man's face, thumbs stroking his cheeks gently. "So, I'm going to kiss you now, and it'll probably be the most rubbish kiss in the history of kisses, but..." 

Poor boy. He never got to finish that self-deprecating bit of horse shit because Phil kissed him instead. It wasn't so much that Phil was a grade-A Lothario, but he was very dedicated to kissing as a concept. The first gentle brush of lips, the unsurprising fact that Fitz tasted like tea with milk and sugar and an extra-strong undercurrent of innocence, the way the boy opened up for him with so much joyful surprise that it made his chest twist...these were all things Phil Coulson savored, because they would never come again. None of his lovers had kissed the same, tasted the same, and each first kiss was more precious for it.

And this first kiss was the sweetest thing he could ever remember.

By the time they parted to breathe, Phil had the back of Leo's head cradled in his palm, their tongues had slid against each other, and the boy was practically undone and shivering. His fists were full of the back of Phil's suit jacket, clutching at it for purchase. "Did I actually just get something I wanted?" he whispers.

"It can be a little terrifying when that happens," Phil murmured back, aware that the infinitesimal space between them felt like their own little world. 

"I could sort of get used to it." 

"Do. Do get used to it." Because now that Phil had held this boy in his arms, tasted his secrets, he wasn't planning on letting go anytime soon. Maybe Fitz would come to his senses at some point, realize that he was with an old man, get his head turned by someone younger and more attractive. But while Phil had him, he was going to hold on tight. That was what you did with something like this. You held on.You protected.

"You might regret saying that," Fitz murmured, unclenching his hands and pushing at Phil's suit jacket until Phil allowed it to fall to the floor. His hands then made expert, quick work of both the shoulder holster and the tie and the top five buttons of Coulson's dress shirt before the older man laid a hand on top of his.

"This should go slower." It wasn't easy to think clearly when a determined little creature was trying to undress him, but Phil had been told he was possessed of formidable willpower when needed. "There's no timer. It's not a test." 

Those were the right words to get through to Leo. Not a test. Not something he had to revise for, to pass with perfect marks before the hour was up. "Then what should I do?" Somehow, since it was Coulson and you could trust Coulson to walk you through anything from storming a HYDRA base to your first time having sex, he felt no shame in just asking.

"I think I know something that you'll like." Actually, it was something Coulson was sure the boy had been craving desperately, because he and Leo were more alike than one might think. "I'm going to take off your clothes, but first you have to swear to me that if I do anything at all you don't like, you'll just tell me. It won't make me go away. I promise you that." 

"I swear, but you had me at 'take off your clothes.' You know that, right?" In fact, Leo was getting a head start by unbuttoning the chunky cardigan that was only one of the many layers he hid behind. Obviously, he felt no need to hide from Coulson.

"I knew that." Phil's lips curved in his small, sweet smile and he gently batted Fitz's hands away so he could continue the good work himself. Sweater, gone. Button-up shirt, gone. His hands slowed as he tugged the boy's undershirt out of his pants, noting how hard the little nipples were through the thin fabric. "Don't be afraid. I think you're beautiful." 

Because he knew that pulling off that shirt, the drag of it across sensitive skin, the act of being bare and vulnerable was terrifying to some. Leo wouldn't have gone his whole life so buttoned down if he was shameless. But those words, again, perfect words, calmed Leo's racing heart and he just smiled like his face might crack. "I think you're daft. But hurry up." 

Phil leaned down to ghost his mouth along the pale, bare skin of Fitz's shoulders, the backs of his fingers stroke those pale, tight nipples. He's rewarded with a full body shiver, and a very gratifying moan. "See? That's pretty much the definition of beauty." Pure, honest, unfiltered responsiveness to the touch of a lover.

This time, Fitz didn't argue, but he did flail around with his hands when Coulson dropped to one knee to rid him of his shoes, socks, and finally trousers and pants. This was always where Leo's imagination frizzled out, usually with him coming helplessly in his own hand. For all his protestations that he knew exactly what he wanted, everything past 'naked' was just madness. Finally, he just rested his searching hands on Phil's shoulders and tried not to come all over the poor man.

There was nothing Phil wanted more at the moment than to just take the boy's clearly aching cock into his mouth, but it was all too clear that Leo was right on the bleeding edge of an epic freak-out. Instead, he got to his feet a little stiffly and leaned in to kiss Fitz again. While he kept up the lazy exploration, he finished unbuttoning his own shirt. 

This was his Rubicon. Leo was his first lover after TAHITI, and he was so innocent and wide-eyed. Had he even considered that the man he was hell-bent on seducing had a huge damn hole in his chest? 

Fitz was so lost in the kiss he didn't even notice at first that Phil's shirt was off. But then he had to breathe, and his eyes drifted open again, hands reaching out automatically to touch the bare skin. That's when it hit him, that Phil was half-naked. And that meant that Phil was probably having a bit of a freak-out of his own.

Never let it be said that Leopold Fitz failed to rise to the occasion. 

"Philip..." His fingers trailed over clean line of Coulson's pectoral muscle, until he got to the scar. 

"I can keep my shirt on," Phil whispered, eyes cast down.

"Like hell you will," Leo whispered, leaning in the rub his soft cheek against the awful, puckered scar tissue. A moment later, after Phil failed to stop him, his lips followed, kissing lightly. "I'm so glad you're still here." Maybe it was selfish, but everyone kept saying things like 'they should have let him die.' Even Coulson said that they should have let him die. But Fitz was fiercely, viscerally glad that this beautiful man was still. right. here. "I can't imagine a world where I never met you." 

Phil felt like someone had a hand in his chest, squeezing at his heart. "Leo, sweetheart..." Yes, this was a very young man, a very innocent one, but he was still the one who made him believe, for the first time since he remembered what he'd suffered, that it was worth it. 

Coulson toed off his shoes and socks, then got rid of his suit pants and underwear, leaving both of them naked. "Come to bed." Leo's small, long-fingered hand fit perfectly in his as he gripped it, then gently led the younger man the few steps over to his bed. "Now I want to show you what I was talking about." 

"Um...I trust you, I'm just...is this very...involved?" Leo sounded so shy it made Coulson smile. Not laugh though, because that would be unkind.

"Actually, it's pretty much the simplest thing. And the best." Phil crawled into the bed and pulled back the light duvet before holding out his hand to Leo. 

Leo grinned and took the offered hand, creeping under the covers and letting Phil take him into surprisingly strong arms. "This, sweetheart. Just...skin on skin." And the indescribably lovely way that the boy curled up against his shoulder and tangled his legs with Phil's.

"Ohh." It was nothing but a soft exhalation against his skin but Fitz turned his pretty eyes up to Phil like he'd just hung the moon. "I see what you mean." 

Now he saw too, that Phil was really not going to rush him. That he was completely safe; that his boundaries would be respected even though he wasn't even sure what they were yet, or if he had them. Perhaps most importantly to Phil at least, this simple profound connection was proof that he'd seen through Leo's bravado, seen his inexperience and youth, and wanted him anyway. It was vital to him, somehow, that Leo understood that. How unconditionally he was wanted.

Leo was not used to this feeling not at all. He was always annoying, a buzzy little fly in the ointment, ridiculous and knowing it but not able to stop it. But oh dear god-he-doesn't-even-believe-in, being held so close and feeling Phil's lips ghosting over his and knowing that even if he got weird or fractious or uncomfortable he wouldn't lose this...it was a sodding miracle. 

"Philip, I really want to kiss you again." This time, he didn't make excuses for himself and his ineptitude, he just leaned up and caught the older man's mouth, hot and eager thanks to the reassurance and newfound security. Coulson smiled around the onslaught, then was promptly far too wrapped up in it to even think. Apparently, Leo was a genius at just about everything.

As the kisses grew ever more invasive and messy, Leo inched himself closer and closer, until he had a hip up over Phil's and his aching cock pressed against the other man's flank. The little noises he was making, the slickness growing against Coulson's skin, it was all intoxicating after so long alone. "Leo, c'mere," he mumbled against swollen, slick lips and he tugged at the boy's narrow hips until he'd settled between the other man's thighs.

Fitz froze for a second when it filtered into his consciousness that he was on TOP of Phil, and that their cocks were pushed together, rubbing together...oh fuck. Fuckity fuck. 

"Eyes, sweetheart, look at me...soon. Soon, okay?" Coulson kept stroking his back with one hand, urging him back up for a wide-eyed, open-mouthed kiss. He got a moan and a shudder in response, so he carried on with the master plan, ragged as it was at the edges. But even as undone as they both were, Phil could at least manage to get a hand down between them to curl around both their cocks. No point in finesse at this stage, they were both too damned close. He just made a fist, tight enough so that when their hips did what they wanted, which was of course to rut, there was plenty of friction.

For all Coulson's age and supposed stamina, it was still a photo finish. Leo's hands got too greedy and dug hard into his shoulders, and the boy's eyes the moment he finally let go--good God could that sight become something he loved with all his heart. Phil's thighs tensed tight around Leo's hips and in a few gasping, groaning, mewling breaths it was done, past, another first swept away.

Leo collapsed artlessly over Phil, his head right over the scar, over the man's heart, a mess of come and sweat and for once he couldn't even muster the fussy neatness to go clean up. Not that Phil was really in the letting-go kind of mood; all he did was shift Leo up a wee bit so he could reach the boy's mouth, taste the little noises still escaping.

"I want t'keep you," Leo slurred against Coulson's lips, drunk on pheromones and satiation. "Can I keep you?" 

"God, yes." The problems would wait until tomorrow. And there would be problems, legions of them. But for tonight, Coulson let himself just hold his sleeping lover, feeling the strong, steady beat of his own heart for the first time in longer than he could remember.

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. SEVEN fics on all of AO3 with the Coulson/Fitz tag? DISGRACEFUL. I will man this ship myself, if I have to. But I shouldn't have to, because look at [this](http://songaboutexiles.tumblr.com/post/91199414578/about-to-post-my-first-coulson-fitz-fic).  
> 2\. I think I may have stolen this title from Fallout Boy, but I can't remember, and it's been going through my head for ages.


End file.
